Got some trouble in my marriage
There is somethin’ just not right
‘Cause I get this funny feeling
When you’re lovin’ me at night
That although your body might be here
Your mind’s some other place
There ain’t no foolin’ me
‘Cause I can see it on your face

There’s a rumor goin ‘round
You’re in the bars most every night
Lookin’ for some trouble
And I don’t think is a fight
If it’s trouble that your wanting
Don’t be coming over here
‘Cause I’ll give you double trouble
You’ll be cryin’ in your beer

There’s a stranger in my bed
When you’re makin’ love to me
She’s right under the bedsheets
Just as plain as it could be
Get that stranger out your head
If you’re lyin’ next to me
‘Cause its just a double bed
It ain’t big enough for three

I found lipstick on your collar
I smell perfume on your clothes
Diamond earrings in your pocket
I don’t have me none of those
If your brain is on hiatus
Thinkin’ with the little head
I will give you so much trouble
You’ll be wishin’ you were dead

If you think I’m only kidding
Best remember this my friend
Keep you eyes out for a baseball bat
That’s comin’ round the bend
And before this night is over
If she’s the one you chose
You’ll be hangin’ in the closet
Danglin’ from my pantyhose